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Calming a High Energy Sensory Seeker

Posted by Debra C. Lowsky, MS, CCC-SLP on 14th Apr 2016

Question:   We are currently working with my son on his out of control behavior mostly at school, but also at home.  I've noticed he likes to run his hands over my arms, or through my hair.  He'll also rub his head against me and such.  So I'm thinking he may be more of a sensory type person than most?  I'm thinking your chewlery just might help him with the stress he seems to have at school.  He clenches his fists, grits his teeth, has thrown or kicked things in his frustraition.  The most common movement is running his hand through his hair or pulling at it.  So my question for you, is knowing this would you say that your product might help give him something to focus his energy on while he calms down?  And if so, how do I know which one would be best to get for him?  He's 7, and I was thinking maybe your necklaces just because they'd be harder to loose.  I'm just conserned about the durability if he's using it to help calm himself when he's upset.  I hope this makes sense, I'm a very tired mom, who feels like she's grasping at straws to help her boy. Thank you for any help or advice you can give on this matter.


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We all have sensory needs to some extent, some people just need different/more/less sensory input than others.  I like to use the following metaphor to explain it:  some people like their coffee black, some people like it with a little sugar, for some it has to be just the right color, etc. - we all have our preferences.

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Calming a High Energy Sensory Seeker

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Typically sensory needs fall into one of two categories (or sometimes a combination of the two): sensory seekers or sensory avoiders.  For avoiders, sounds may be too loud, the slightest tough might be painful, etc., so they tend to avoid things.  It sounds like your son falls into the sensory seeker side of things, which means he craves extra input, especially tactile input hence running his hands over your arms, through your hair, etc.

I’m not entirely sure our chew tools could help.  Usually they’re the best fit for children who are oral sensory seekers - they have a need to chew and put various non-food items in their mouths.  They can also be used to provide a safe alternative to nail biting, tooth grinding, thumb sucking, etc. - anything oral / in the mouth.  The only oral thing you mentioned was gritting his teeth when he’s stressed.  So it’s possible using a chew tool instead may help - it could even be that chewing would be very calming and he just doesn’t know it yet.  For more information on how chewing can be therapeutic / calming, check out this post here.  Or, it could be that clenching ones teeth is just something a lot of people do in general when they’re stressed.

If you’d like to try one, I’d recommend one of the standard/softest levels (our chew tools come in 3 different toughness levels, and the tougher XT and XXT ones are usually more for children with a heavier need to chew - chewing holes in shirts, chewing pencils apart, etc.).  So those wouldn't be applicable for your son.

It sounds like you may be meeting with an occupational therapist (OT) already, but if not, that would most likely be a great idea.  Ideally look for an OT with sensory experience.  His school might have one on staff and if not, his pediatrician can make a referral.  The OT will be able to assess his needs and if necessary, put together what’s called a “sensory diet” for him, which usually includes things like ‘heavy work’ activities or some of these calming ideas for school.

Introducing him to more tactile / textured things may also help.  If he likes the sensation of running his hands through his hair, see if you can find a fidget or some sort of material or stuffed animal with a similar feel to it.  You can create a sensory bin and let him run his hands through it - even just a big bowl or bin of rice can feel really nice digging your hands in (very calming).  And so forth.

Sensory needs can definitely be very complex, but they can also be very intuitive.  Based on my experience, in many cases you can watch him, see what he needs, and then create a safe environment for him to meet those needs.   For example, if he likes to crash into things (some sensory seekers do this looking for more input to the body), make a mountain of pillows in the living room and let him crash into them.  If he likes to spin, put a tire swing in the backyard.  Etc.

Seeing an OT is really the best thing, but I hope some of this is helpful in the meantime :).

So hang in there!  You’re on the right track, and it will get easier.

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All my best,

Debbie

Debra C. Lowsky, MS, CCC-SLP

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